


A Twitter Fic? How Creative

by T_5Seconds



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, F/M, I will not explain my rarepairs, M/M, Multi, OOC, Pietro Maximoff Lives, Self-Indulgent, Social Media, Twitter, Twitter Fic, like this is what I want to see and you can watch i guess, shamless wish fulfillment, they're in love now. that's how it is
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:08:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 3,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27389239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/T_5Seconds/pseuds/T_5Seconds
Summary: You've all seen it before. MCU Twitter fic, with added complete canon divergence.This is also a place for me to dump my crackships. Be ready for nonsensical romance.
Relationships: Carol Danvers/Nick Fury, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers/Sam Wilson, Nebula/Natasha Romanov, Phil Coulson/Loki
Comments: 10
Kudos: 62





	1. Introductions

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [twitter is onto something](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15625167) by [pomegranateboy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pomegranateboy/pseuds/pomegranateboy). 



> Fair warning: this fic is planned to update once a week, on thursday. this might not always be true-twitter fics are deceptively hard to come up with ideas for.

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan

hey y'all

|

better spider-man@ghostspider

did you just use "y'all?"

|

cheese@cheese

holy shit are these the actual vigilantes

\---

truth and justice@stverogers

Who took @steverogers it's MY NAME

|

not captain america@steverogers

oops

|

truth and justice@stverogers

Give it back!

|

jesus@whitewolf

don't give it to him

|

truth and justice@stverogers

BUCKY

\---

Avengers News@unofficalavengers

Today's an exciting day! Popular vigilantes Spider-Man and Ghost Spider have joined Twitter!

|

Avengers News@unofficalavengers

Today's a VERY exciting day, Captain America and Sergeant Barnes have also joined Twitter!!!

|

I make things shake@quake

contain your fanboy a little

|

Avengers News@unofficalavengers

You're grounded.

|

I make things shake@quake

you can't do that!

|

Avengers News@unofficalavengers

ANYWAY, with the arrival of these two, the only avengers to not have social media are Scarlet Witch, Quicksilver, and Thor.

|

i'm blue@dabadee

wait, black widow has a social media?

|

the only braincell@blackwidow

;)

|

i'm blue@dabadee

HOLY SHIT


	2. Introductions 2.0

Nick Fury@directorofshield

I'm surrounded by idiots.

|

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton

aren't you a spy why do you have twitter

|

Narrative device@deadpool

plot

|

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton

what

\---

what@arethose

hey... @stverogers are you dating @whitewolf

|

truth and justice@stverogers

yes but you're forgetting someone

|

what@arethose

WAIT REALLY

|

jesus@whitewolf

why does nobody remember sam

|

falcon@samwilson

it's the racism

|

truth and justice@stverogers

yes so i'm dating sam and bucky

\---

Avengers News@unofficalavengers

hfukxshnb

|

I make things shake@quake

are you dying again

|

mulan@may

It's too soon to joke about that.

|

I make things shake@quake

sorry mom

|

I make things shake@quake

WAIT FUCK

|

mulan@may

my heart is so full

\---

prepare for trouble@wandamaximoff

;

|

and make it double@pietromaximoff

)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have only seen... the first season of AOS... but that won't stop me


	3. Confusion and Loki

Avengers News@unofficalavengers

I can't keep up with all this NEWS

|

Nick Fury@directorofshield

Do your job instead.

|

Avengers News@unofficalavengers

no

\---

cheese@cheese

so like. am i missing something? who is @unofficalavengers because they SAY they're unofficial but nick fury is talking to them

|

Avengers News@unofficalavengers

That's classified.

|

cheese@cheese

???

\---

be gay do crime@lowkey

what if i took over the world

|

Avengers News@unofficalavengers

what if you went to jail

|

be gay do crime@lowkey

but i don't want to

|

Avengers News@unofficalavengers

there's cookies

|

be gay do crime@lowkey

...what kind of cookies

|

i'm blue@dabadee

what the fuck is going on is that loki

|

Avengers News@unofficalavengers

they're thin mints

|

be gay do crime@lowkey

i'll be right there

|

Nick Fury@directorofshield

This is why you're not allowed to be officialavengers

|

cheese@cheese

WHAT THE FUCK???

\---

what is love@babydonthurtme

why does loki have twitter before Thor does??

|

be gay do crime@lowkey

i'm better

|

what is love@babydonthurtme

you tried to take over the world

|

be gay do crime@lowkey

yeah but i'm still better

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't need canon, canon needs me


	4. Back To Basics

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan

i feel like i've been overshadowed

|

truth and justice@stverogers

Surprisingly so do I

|

jesus@whitewolf

someone's chatting with loki and suddenly we're old news

|

prepare for trouble@wandamaximoff

we should unionize

\---

prepare for trouble@wandamaximoff

hey guys and gays, i'm aroace

|

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton

proud of you, kid.

|

the better hawkeye@katebishop

me too! aroace, that is, but i'm also proud of you

|

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton

that's why kate's better, she's arrow

\---

i'm blue@dabadee

oh my god??? wanda maximoff is aroace?? she's lgbt? i am crying??

|

cheese@cheese

we stan so hard

\---

what is love@babydonthurtme

first lgbt hero!!

|

jesus@whitewolf

what am i, chopped liver?

|

what is love@babydonthurtme

OH SHIT I FORGOT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I abruptly remember that this is a twitter fic and people need to be gay


	5. So, You Got Impersonated

better spider-man@ghostspider

mothers and fuckers of the jury;

|

the devil of HK@daredevil

I am going to kill you.

\---

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan

hey @stverogers why did you make those PSA's anyway

|

truth and justice@stverogers

What PSA's?

|

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan

you know? these? [Link]

|

truth and justice@stverogers

I didn't make those? Who is that and why do they sound like me?

|

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan

OH MY GOD THE PSA'S ARE FAKE???

|

i'm blue@dabadee

RED ALERT GUYS THE PSA'S ARE FAKE

|

what is love@babydonthurtme

BUT THEN WHO

|

be gay do crime@lowkey

hehehe

|

what is love@babydonthurtme

W H A T

\---

cheese@cheese

how did loki even get that idea

|

Avengers News@unofficalavengers

*coughs*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A headcanon of mine, mixed with some very very non canon flavour.


	6. Crack Ship

I make things shake@quake

hey so ac got kidnapped

|

be gay do crime@lowkey

he WHAT

|

be gay do crime@lowkey

where.

|

engineer@fitz

are you? going to save him?

|

be gay do crime@lowkey

JUST TELL ME WHERE

|

I make things shake@quake

I'll DM you

\---

Avengers News@unofficalavengers

Hey I'm back, thanks Loki

|

be gay do crime@lowkey

never mention it ever again

|

Nick Fury@directorofshield

I knew you two were on friendly terms, but I didn't know you were friends.

|

bio@simmons

you poor ignorant soul

|

Nick Fury@directorofshield

What?

|

Nick Fury@directorofshield

What does that mean?

|

Nick Fury@directorofshield

SIMMONS WHAT DOES THAT MEAN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This may be the least canonical ship ever, but I like it and there's nothing you can do about it


	7. Hair Dye

jesus@whitewolf

steve just called. his hair is dyed neon orange. why.

|

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton

it was a mistake, i meant for it to be pink

|

truth and justice@stverogers

THAT'S NOT BETTER

|

the only braincell@blackwidow

pink would suit you

|

truth and justice@stverogers

NO

\---

falcon@samwilson

why is steve's hair bright pink

|

truth and justice@stverogers

she got me

\---

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton

someone help, i'm stuck in the vents

|

the only braincell@blackwidow

you got yourself into this mess

|

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton

i don't deserve this

|

truth and justice@stverogers

yes you do

|

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton

:(

\---

prepare for trouble@wandamaximoff

i miss my brother. he died tragically in sokovia and i will forever mourn him

|

and make it double@pietromaximoff

stop telling everyone i'm dead

\---

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan

i swing both ways

|

better spider-man@ghostspider

same

\---

cheese@cheese

so many heroes are lgbt... we're really winning

|

i'm blue@dabadee

ikr

\---

starlord@quill

Earth looks different to how I remember

|

what is love@babydonthurtme

wait what

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cliche? maybe. funny? absolutely


	8. Guardians of something or other

falcon@samwilson

oh look, aliens

|

starlord@quill

hey, i'm half human, don't be rude

|

what@arethose

sorry, what?

|

starlord@quill

i'm half human! my mom was a human and my dad was an alien

|

what is love@babydonthurtme

oh my god are you peter quill? 

|

starlord@quill

yeah why

|

i'm blue@dabadee

THE CONSPIRACIES WERE RIGHT

\---

starlord@quill

DAVID BOWIE IS DEAD?

|

the smart one@gamora

we never should have come to earth

\---

the only braincell@blackwidow

oh no... women, my only weakness

|

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton

REALLY? WHO

|

the only braincell@blackwidow

shut up clint

|

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton

Is it one of the aliens? I bet it's one of the aliens

|

space robot@nebula

The widow likes women?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I introduce the second crack ship. Smoothly. I am a natural.


	9. second verse, same as the first

jesus@whitewolf 

i swear if that's more aliens 

\--- 

Thor@godofthunder 

Hello, Midgard! 

| 

big mean@greenbean 

I am also here 

| 

truth and justice@stverogers 

Thor? Bruce? It's so good to hear from you! 

| 

Thor@godofthunder 

Thank you, my friend! It is good to be back! 

\--- 

be gay do crime@lowkey 

well, fuck 

| 

Thor@godofthunder 

Loki? Brother? I thought you were dead! 

| 

be gay do crime@lowkey 

somebody hide me 

| 

Avengers News@unofficalavengers 

Okay 

\--- 

Avengers News@unofficalavengers 

A lot of news! Thor is back, he brought Bruce Banner, and Loki has mysteriously disappeared. 

| 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

YOU CAN'T HARBOUR CRIMINALS, ESPECIALLY LOKI 

| 

Avengers News@unofficalavengers 

That was weird. Could've sworn I heard something. Must've been the wind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I introduce ALL THE ALIENS AT ONCE


	10. blue raspberry jolly rancher

space robot@nebula 

how does one date a terran 

| 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

depends, which one 

| 

space robot@nebula 

... 

| 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

I KNEW IT 

| 

the only braincell@blackwidow 

get off twitter and i'll teach you 

| 

space robot@nebula 

alright. 

\--- 

i'm blue@dabadee 

so what's the nebula x black widow ship name. get on it. 

| 

cheese@cheese 

hmm this is a good question 

\--- 

what is love@babydonthurtme 

so @blackwidow how was the date 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

I'd say the date went well 

| 

blueberry@nebula 

I'd agree, we should do it more often 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

Oh definitely. 

\--- 

cheese@cheese 

SHIP NAME DEBATE SOLVED, THEY'RE ~BLUE RASPBERRY~ 

| 

i'm blue@dabadee 

YOU'RE A GENIUS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ship names are hard, candy names are easy


	11. aranchophobia

better spider-man@ghostspider 

spider-man is afraid of spiders 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

false 

\--- 

Avengers News@unofficalavengers 

Not specifically about the Avengers, but news nonetheless: Spider-Man is afraid of spiders. 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

i can't believe this. i'm being bullied by a shady government agent 

| 

cheese@cheese 

lmao really 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

@ghostspider this is all your fault 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

i will have my revenge 

\--- 

i'm blue@dabadee 

wait do the avengers know who @unofficalavengers is? 

| 

truth and justice@stverogers 

no 

| 

falcon@samwilson 

no 

| 

jesus@whitewolf 

maybe? 

| 

Thor@godofthunder 

No. 

| 

big mean@greenbean 

no 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

yes 

| 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

yes 

| 

Avengers News@unofficalavengers 

Yes. 

| 

i'm blue@dabadee 

you're not an avenger? 

| 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

He is. 

| 

i'm blue@dabadee 

what

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm willing to bet at least one of these tweets goes over twitter's character limit, but i'm not going to check and neither are you


	12. oh captain my captain

what is love@babydonthurtme 

@unofficalavengers how did you meet @lowkey 

| 

Avengers News@unofficalavengers 

Well, at first we were just enemies. 

| 

Avengers News@unofficalavengers 

But he kept turning up, and eventually quips while fighting turned into friendship. It was a pretty long process. 

| 

be gay do crime@lowkey 

yeah, we were trying to kill each other for a while 

| 

what@arethose 

enemies to lovers slow burn 

\--- 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

oh fuck 

| 

i'm blue@dabadee 

what? 

| 

Avengers News@unofficalavengers 

breaking news: fury is a simp 

| 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

I'M NOT. 

| 

Avengers News@unofficalavengers 

oh? you're not? Well it's understandable, she's not that cool anyway 

| 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

YOU TAKE THAT BACK 

| 

Avengers News@unofficalavengers 

You heard it here first: fury is a simp. 

| 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

fuck you 

\--- 

Captain Marvel@danvers 

Hey, I'm back on Earth, it's been a while. Did I miss anything? 

| 

cheese@cheese 

depends, how long have you been gone 

| 

Captain Marvel@danvers 

only like five years 

| 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

You missed a lot. 

| 

Captain Marvel@danvers 

Oh hey Nick! How's Goose? 

| 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

She's fine. 

| 

Maria Hill@deputydirector 

You can't see him, but he's blushing 

| 

Captain Marvel@danvers 

Really? I'm flattered. 

| 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

Hill, you're fired

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's pretty obvious that carol and maria were in love... but what if... poly


	13. *jeopardy music*

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

i've been stabbed 

| 

better spider-man@ghostspider 

are you okay?! 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

i hope so 

\--- 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

we should get back together... like a boy band 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

that's all well and good but what about loki 

| 

Avengers News@unofficalavengers 

he's not so bad, i will vouch for him 

| 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

he can be there but if he tries something i will kill him 

| 

be gay do crime@lowkey 

fair enough 

| 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

Please do not all meet up 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

ok so when we meeting up 

| 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

NO 

\--- 

what@arethose 

OK EVERYONE GUESSING TIME. who runs avengers news? 

| 

what@arethose 

now i know what you're thinking- it's probably someone we've never heard of. 

| 

what@arethose 

but! fury said they were an avenger! so we might!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, here's the thing! I'm not quite sure what people in the MCU would guess! So leave a comment, and I'll probably include that- if nobody comments I'll simply never address this thread again.


	14. congrats on the audience participation

cheese@cheese 

if we're including people we already know, i'd say maybe black widow? casually speaking to nick fury, is a spy so could hide their identity  
#whorunsavengersnews 

| 

what@arethose 

good guess! i like it, although it would mess with #blueraspberry 

|

cheese@cheese 

oof you're right 

\--- 

what is love@babydonthurtme 

i was thinking maybe bruce banner? idk, he doesn't have a lot of personal issue with loki and like... vibes ig  
#whorunsavengersnews 

| 

what@arethose 

he does have the vibes... a good guess, let me grab some red string 

\--- 

i'm blue@dabadee 

now hear me out... spiderman. we don't know how old he is, or anything about him. it would just be another secret identity. #whorunsavengersnews 

| 

what@arethose 

OH that's so valid. is he an avenger? 

| 

i'm blue@dabadee 

he deserves to be 

\--- 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

In regards to #whorunsavengersnews : @blackwidow @greenbean 

| 

cheese@cheese 

why did you not @doeswhateveraspidercan ? 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

YEAH WHY 

| 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

You aren't an Avenger. 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

:( 

\--- 

raspberry@blackwidow 

so sorry, conspiracy theorists, but i am taken @nebula <3 

| 

blueberry@nebula 

what's that? 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

it's a heart! it means i love you 

| 

blueberry@nebula 

<3 <3 <3 

\--- 

big mean@greenbean 

uh... no. 

| 

what is love@babydonthurtme 

what a solid defense 

| 

i'm blue@dabadee 

i'm sure THAT will hold up in court

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you to the person who commented last chapter- you single-handedly made this exist


	15. of asgardians and alcohol

i'm blue@dabadee 

why does thor live here now 

| 

thor@godofthunder 

my sister exploded the planet 

| 

hela@bringerofdeath 

my bad 

| 

cheese@cheese 

thor has a sister? 

| 

be gay do crime@lowkey 

I HAVE A SISTER??? jk i knew that already 

| 

hela@bringerofdeath 

nice to see you actually alive this time 

| 

i'm blue@dabadee 

what is going on 

\--- 

chaotic bi@valkyrie 

why is midgardian alcohol so WEAK 

| 

be gay do crime@lowkey 

our alcohol is actually so strong it can kill mortals 

| 

chaotic bi@valkyrie 

that's ridiculous. how do they get drunk? 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

vodka. 

| 

chaotic bi@valkyrie 

what's that? 

\--- 

chaotic bi@valkyrie 

apparently mortals have some good alcohol after all 

| 

big mean@greenbean 

you drank four bottles of vodka 

| 

chaotic bi@valkyrie 

and what about it 

\--- 

cheese@cheese 

who is @valkyrie 

| 

hela@bringerofdeath 

soon-to-be king of asgard 

| 

cheese@cheese 

what?? 

| 

chaotic bi@valkyrie 

she means she's going to overthrow thor and then marry me and since she'd be queen i'd be king 

| 

i'm blue@dabadee 

now we don't have time to unpack all of that! 

\--- 

Avengers News@unofficalavengers 

i'm definitely not a news account anymore 

| 

ac@unofficalavengers 

and so the nickname has become the twitter handle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> catch me alluding to lore and then not acknowledging it


	16. the ball

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is inspired by [this fic.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16620764)

better spider-man@ghostspider 

THE BALL IS IN NEW YORK 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

w h a t ? 

| 

the devil of HK@daredevil 

It's mine. 

| 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

@unofficalavengers @blackwidow @may team up? 

| 

ac@unofficalavengers 

Now hear me out: also loki 

| 

mulan@may 

all in favor of us and loki, say i 

| 

ac@unofficalavengers 

i 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

i 

| 

be gay do crime@lowkey 

i 

| 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

i 

| 

Nick Fury@directorofshield 

Even you, Barton? 

| 

better spider-man@ghostspider 

oh i'm never going to get back The Ball if they take it 

| 

the devil of HK@daredevil 

You have the ball? 

| 

better spider-man@ghostspider 

fuck 

\--- 

be gay do crime@lowkey 

give us The Ball 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

NEVER 

| 

cheese@cheese 

i'm so confused 

| 

Spider-man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

THEIF 

| 

and make it double@pietromaximoff 

what, didn't see that coming? 

\--- 

prepare for trouble@wandamaximoff 

FUCK YOU WADE 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

It's mine 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

ow 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

Spider... how could you 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

sorry, wade. there are no rules in love and war 

\--- 

be gay do crime@lowkey 

this reminds me of when i tried to take over the world 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

how so 

| 

be gay do crime@lowkey 

everyone's attacking me and also each other 

\--- 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

betrayed by my own protégé 

| 

the better hawkeye@katebishop 

>:) 

\--- 

the devil of HK@daredevil 

Can we agree that a team of five is too many? 

| 

better spider-man@ghostspider 

yeah, we should only work alone or in pairs 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

agreed 

\--- 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

and like a boyband, we break up 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

i'll stick with you 

| 

ac@unofficalavengers 

@lowkey guess it's us against the world 

| 

be gay do crime@lowkey 

guess it is 

| 

mulan@may 

i refuse to do this alone, @quake let's team 

| 

I make things shake@quake 

alright! 

\--- 

jesus@whitewolf 

GIVE ME THE BALL 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

did you fly to NY for this??? 

\--- 

jesus@whitewolf 

I HAVE THE BALL 

| 

jesus@whitewolf 

NEVERMIND 

| 

jesus@whitewolf 

well, i definitely know who @unofficialavengers is now 

| 

ac@unofficialavengers 

you saw nothing 

\--- 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

this is a really dramatic fight 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

yeah. the rain... @unofficalavengers sniping you... the betrayal... it's so good 

| 

be gay do crime@lowkey 

i think the bit where he said "i'm sorry, clint" before taking The Ball and knocking you out was movie worthy 

| 

mulan@may 

if this wasn't for fun, i'd be fucking weeping 

| 

I make things shake@quake 

can't believe ac is a theater kid 

\--- 

cheese@cheese 

just witnessed spider-man punch daredevil 

\--- 

better spider-man@ghostspider 

give it up, you're surrounded 

| 

be gay do crime@lowkey 

i'm never surrounded. 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

where did he go??? 

| 

jesus@whitewolf 

was that the tesseract 

\--- 

prepare for trouble@wandamaximoff 

The Ball has left new york 

| 

jesus@whitewolf 

WHAT 

| 

the devil of HK@daredevil 

What happened? 

| 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

i stuck it to an arrow and tried to fire it towards nat, but spidey webbed the arrow 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

turns out hawkeye had some explosives in there i accidentally triggered, and the explosion launched The Ball out of state 

| 

and make it double@pietromaximoff 

where were you even fighting??? 

| 

better spider-man@ghostspider 

at the state border 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

why 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

drama 

\--- 

what is love@babydonthurtme 

who won? 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

maximoff twins stole it the most, spider team had it for the longest continuous period, the theater kids had it for the longest combined time 

| 

i'm blue@dabadee 

who are the theater kids 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

@unofficalavengers and @lowkey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i believe there is another twitter fic inspired by the same fic as the one linked at the beginning, but i can't find it.


	17. exposition

what is love@babydonthurtme 

i'm confused? because i thought black widow was dating nebula? but i just saw her kiss hawkeye? 

| 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

it's poly 

| 

cheese@cheese 

POLY REP OH MY GOD IM CRYING 

\--- 

raspberry@blackwidow 

clint is officially dead to me 

| 

truth and justice@stverogers 

why? 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

he stole my favorite sweater 

| 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

nat please no i'm sorry 

\--- 

falcon@samwilson 

why did i just hear clint scream 

| 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

MY BED IS FULL OF PLASTIC SPIDERS 

| 

and make it double@pietromaximoff 

lmao 

\--- 

i'm blue@dabadee 

so like... there are so many superpowered people. how do you keep track 

| 

big mean@greenbean 

we're split into teams! there is a lot of overlap tho 

| 

i'm blue@dabadee 

cool, makes sense. if you don't mind me asking, what are the teams? 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

I'm glad you asked! 

@blackwidow, @clintbarton, @unofficalavengers, and @may are the old SHIELD besties! @directorofshield and @deputydirector are sometimes included. 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

@unofficalavengers, @may, @quake, @simmons and @fitz are team bus! 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

@stverogers, @greenbean, @godofthunder, @blackwidow and @clintbarton are the og avengers! @unofficalavengers could be included ;) 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

@godofthunder, @valkyrie, @bringerofdeath, and @lowkey are asgardian! @greenbean kinda counts too! 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

@gamora, @nebula, and @quill are the guardians of the galaxy! there's also some others but they don't have twitter :) 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

@doeswhateveraspidercan, @ghostspider, @daredevil and sometimes @katebishop are vigilante squad! And me! 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

@whitewolf, @samwilson, @wandamaximoff and @pietromaximoff are the non-og avengers! @danvers would be here, since she joined the team later, but she's technically the first avenger, so she isn't 

| 

better spider-man@ghostspider 

wade, the character limit... how 

| 

Narrative Device@deadpool 

;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact this chapter was entirely for my own organization but then i just decided to post it


	18. paintball

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

we should do paintball 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

that's a terrible idea. when are you free 

\--- 

jesus@whitewolf 

EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF 

\--- 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

there's paint everywhere 

| 

Spider-Man@doeswhateveraspidercan 

including on me. spider-sense cannot protect from speed 

| 

and make it double@pietromaximoff 

2 fast 4 u 

| 

prepare for trouble@wandamaximoff 

i'm disowning you 

\--- 

falcon@samwilson 

steve is blocking paint with his shield 

\--- 

big mean@greenbean 

thor is out but he's unwilling to accept it 

| 

thor@godofthunder 

I could survive a bullet, surely I can survive paint! 

| 

big mean@greenbean 

that's not how paintball works 

\--- 

chaotic bi@valkyrie 

this is actually fun 

| 

hela@bringerofdeath 

yeah, it is 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

you two have gotten eleven people combined 

| 

chaotic bi@valkyrie 

really fun 

\--- 

Captain Marvel@danvers 

as the last four who are in, i propose a dramatic showdown 

| 

chaotic bi@valkyrie 

ok 

| 

blueberry@nebula 

ok 

| 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

ok 

\--- 

cheese@cheese 

who won the dramatic showdown? 

| 

raspberry@blackwidow 

clint sniped valkyrie, got hit by nebula, and danvers got nebula 

| 

Captain Marvel@danvers 

I'm changing my name 

| 

the strongest avenger@danvers 

there we go 

| 

the worse hawkeye@clintbarton 

ok there's no need to gloat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "but author," you say, "this is extremely similar to a different chapter." to which i say shhh i'm running out of ideas

**Author's Note:**

> This fic runs pretty much entirely on random ideas, so if there's anything you want to see, comment it!


End file.
